Hi everyone! I hope you’re all well.
Today’s blog post is one I’ve been drafting up for ages and finally got round to posting. If you follow any other lifestyle bloggers, you’ll have read posts like this before.
This has taken me ages to write because, to be honest, I couldn’t really think of many things to say. But… after sitting down and really racking my brains (sorry, that phrase makes me feel violently ill) I actually came up with a lot of points.
Sorry if you find these kind of personal posts really boring, but… prepare for an essay and a half. Let’s do this.
It’s Okay Not To Have a Plan
This is something I’ve only learnt recently, to be honest. It’s so scary growing up. At 14/15, you’re asked to choose your GCSE options as if they’re more important than your life itself. Listen here – they’re not! Don’t get me wrong, you should try your best in exams, but if you don’t do too great, it’s really not the end of the world.
At 16, you finish your GCSE’s – are you going to sixth-form now? Which one? Don’t go to that one, I heard it’s crap.
Then, after that is when it gets really tough. What are you doing with your life after college? At my college, they drummed ‘UCAS’ into your head so often that I was practically dreaming of the dreaded word.
I didn’t have a very clear idea of what I wanted. Apprenticeship? Work? Uni?
Rather than just chilling out and realising that I was only bloody 18 years old and shouldn’t be so terrified of what to do next, I felt panicked and in the end decided to enrol at uni (100% down to pressure) when ultimately, I really didn’t know what I wanted to do.
I was so unsure about university, but I felt like I needed a plan. In reality, I didn’t. I could have had a gap year and thought about my life, but I didn’t, simply because I thought it would make me a failure not knowing what the next big step was. I would 100% tell my younger self to relax – it’s okay to not have your future planned out.
Know Your Worth
This is something that I wish I could tell my younger teenage self A MILLION TIMES OVER and slap myself hard in the face with it. Know you worth, gal. If something or someone is making you feel like you’re not worth a million quid, tell ’em boy bye.
I feel that when I was younger, I didn’t appreciate myself enough; you need to love yourself and although it sounds selfish, put yourself first!
At the end of the day, you’re always going to be stuck with you no matter what, so you may as well ensure you’re the happiest version you can be. If that means realising your worth, ditch the source of the problem ASAP.
I wish I could have made myself see when something was making me desperately unhappy. Dayna, don’t stick around and deal with it for years hun. You’re worth more and we know it.
Ask For Help When You Need It
So many times as my younger self I’d felt confused, upset or unsure about something and never asked for help or advice. Young Dayna, don’t do this babes.
I wish I could go back to my younger teen self and encourage her to ask for help, because I really needed it in a multitude of situations and often sat in silence! Silly gurl.
I’ve suffered with OCD for as long as I can remember and only in the past year or so started opening up a bit more, talking about it, and reached out for help. I was actually thinking about writing a blog post on it, but I think it would end up being as long as the bible, to be honest.
It was particularly a struggle when I was aged 13-14 and 17-18, and I literally didn’t talk to anyone about it because I knew most wouldn’t understand. Over the years it’s affected me massively and only recently did I really pluck up the courage to actually ask for help – mental health is extremely important and should never go amiss!
My younger self would never talk about things that were bothering me. Now, I know (probably all too well) that a bloody good rant and a moan is sometimes the only way to solve things.
Don’t Compare Yourself To Others
Oh man, this is something I used to beat myself up about when I was younger. I’d literally feel terrible about myself if someone had longer hair than me, a nicer bag than me or bigger boobs than me (which by the way, is everyone. Including males.)
I’d constantly be worried about how I looked compared to everyone else, and always try and mimic what I thought was ‘cool’ or fashionable. Get a lifeeeee Dayna.
I think a lot of people have this problem, to be frank. You have to remember – you are you, at the end of the day, and that’s not changing no matter what. People forget to appreciate the qualities they have because they’re too obsessed with comparing themselves to other people. This was definitely something I did too much when I was young.
Stop Caring What People Think About You
Oh bloody ‘ell, this was the FIRST thing that came into my head, but also probably a bit cliche.
Seriously, though – going through school, college or wherever, there are always going to be a bunch of ‘cool kids’ who think doing anything slightly out of the ordinary is embarrassing or sad. They, my friends, are wrong.
Even when I wanted to create my own blog because I love to write, I put it off for over a year because I was worried about people judging me or thinking it was cringey; I’m actually annoyed writing this because I should not have given one shit!
Who cares if so and so laughs about what you’re doing? If you’re actually getting off your arse, making something of yourself and using your talents, then bloody go for it! I absolutely love blogging and am so happy I set up Dayna Chats nearly 9 months ago.
I wish I could go back to secondary school (high school, if you’re reading from the US) and just not give a toss; school creates so much pressure to look and act a certain way, when in reality, once you’ve done a bit of growing up you realise how unimportant it is to be ‘normal’ and how important it is to be yourself.
Lastly… For The Love of God, Burn Those Bloody Hotpants!
I know the previous point was to not care what people think about you, but trust me, the hotpants are just an exception. Nobody should don those the way I did.
If you’re from Brighton, you’ll remember the shop Expose. My skin crawled writing that word.
It was the shoddiest, grimmest, cheapest shop known to man, selling clothes alike to those from an Eastenders market sale. Most of the items in there pitifully looked like they’d been vomited on by a sequin.
They sold these tiny black hotpants which essentially covered up as much as a thong. I thought it would be really cool to wear these into town, or just to the cinema, as a normal outfit with a pair of tights. Not gonna lie, I feel unwell typing this. Over and out.
I hope you all enjoyed this slightly different and rather deep post, me thinks. Let me know if you enjoy reading personal entries like this- they seem to be very popular, you nosy bastards.
Love, Dayna x